Waiting For The End Of The World

There's snow in San Francisco and I'm sitting through a tornado watch in Chicago. But this isn't what's worrying me tonight, this isn't what making me feel like four pissed off guys who I'm guessing are going to look a lot like Skeletor are going to go come through the sky on scary skeleton horses in the middle of the night. This is. Republicans are turning on George Bush? It wasn't until this very moment that I became ashamed to be an American. Now, well now I might as well be Canadian. That's how sick I feel (though for the sake of full disclosure, that might also be from the beef stroganof I made tonight). I'm deeply ashamed by Mitt Romney, the beloved governor from my home state (if there's one thing we love in Massachusetts, its a Republican Governor), a man who has spent his governorship working hard to make Massachusetts a better place, never once using his position as a way to showboat for the GOP, never once using the people of the Commonwealth of Massachusetts as a mere resumé builder. And now, after years of building up this sweet, valuable trust, he wastes it in a 15 minute speech, criticizing President Bush on spending? Just gut me with a knife governor, because you already have emotionally. Emotionally, I'm a trout, slowly drying on a rack in some God forsaken smokehaus. Don't these people get it? The inept cronies, the ballooning cost of an increasingly unpopular and seemingly unendable war, the cries of civil rights violations - those were all there before the election, we all knew about them as we went into the booths. And yes, the manslaughter angle is new, but we all know that was an accident. Are you going to stare me in the eye and tell me that you've never mistaken one of your best friends for a quail? I did not think so. None of this was the point though, there was only one thing that got the President reelected, and it's the one thing that he's come through on, in spades in fact. He kept the queers from marrying each other. There, right there. That's it in a nutshell. That's all the American people really worry about, that's what wins you elections. Governor Romney of all people should know this, since he is the man who valiantly went out of his way to make sure state clerks enforced an obscure law that barred out of state couples from obtaining marriage licenses, a law that was originally created to stop interracial marriages, in order to decrease the amount of same sex marriage licenses being awarded in the state. That, ladies and gentlemen, is commitment. But now it's about pork barrel spending? I call that a cop out. And you governor, I call you a coward. A coward with a terrific smile.

And all this cut and running is premature, especially now that the conservative philosophy is finally taking over the one demographic that actually matters - Hollywood. All of that talk about Hollywood taking a political stance was squashed last week when 'Brokeback Mountain', a progressive homosexual love story, was beaten out by 'Crash', a poorly written after school special that thought it was making profound statements about racism. The most liberal sect in the country gave a swift "no thank you" to the gay agenda. And look at television. You can just feel the paranoia dripping off of shows like '24', 'Lost', and 'Battlestar Galactica'(which had an amazing season finale Friday night, if, for no other reason, it proved that Dean Stockwell is still one 'suave fuck', even 20 years later), with their constant talks of 'moles', 'others', and 'cylons' (which are like robotic moles). And where did that paranoia come from? The Bush Administration of course. All of this is a direct result of the years of 'if you're not with us, you're against us' talk that's been coming from this administration for the last 5 years. We've had plenty of justified chances to desert the president, but now is not one of them. We need to stick by him, lest he become a modern day Van Gogh, mumbling to himself in the corner of his Crawford ranch, rubbing the stub that was left after Dick Cheney blew his ear off, unaware that all of the work he had done finally paid off as we quietly slip into a totalitarian government. The man has done too much to deserve to be treated like this. You hear me Governor Romney, you better change your... oh who am I kidding, I can't stay mad at you, not with those pearly whites. Do you use Crest? Yeah, yeah I bet you do.

(All of this had me in kind of a funk today. That is, until I found this)